Alice, this is my first winter
of waking without you, of knowing
that you, dressed in familiar clothes
are elsewhere, perhaps not even
conscious of our anniversary. Have
you noticed? The earth's still as hard,
the same empty gardens exist; it is
as if nothing special had changed,
I wake with another mouth feeding
from me, yet still feel as if
Love had not the right
to walk out of me. A year now. So
what? you say. I send out my spies
to discover what you are doing. They smile,
return, tell me your body's as firm,
you are as alive, as warm and inviting
as when they knew you first... Perhaps it is
the winter, its isolation from other seasons,
that sends me your ghost to witness
when I wake. Somebody came here today, asked
how you were keeping, what
you were doing. I imagine you,
waking in another city, touched
by this same hour. So ordinary
a thing as loss comes now and touches me.
Message: This poem is about the poet wondering what his ex wife is doing and marvelling at the feeling of emptiness and loss, as well as showing his attempt to overcome the end of his marriage with 'Alice'.
The poem doesn't have a particular form. It is written in one complete stanza and has a lot of enjambment. Enjambment shows that the poem is having endless thoughts about 'Alice', suggesting that even though he is supposed to get over his wife just as his marriage has ended, his mind is still full of thoughts about 'Alice' and what she is doing- he is obsessed with her even though they aren't together anymore. This is reinforced by the word that Patten chooses to put into his poem: 'spies', which have connotations to war as spies are sent out to retrieve information so that a country can have the upper hand of the situation and gain more control. He also writes that he still feels 'as if/ Love had not the right/ to walk out of me' showing that he feels that it is unfair for him to be left alone now. All of this show that although he is supposed to be leaving his marriage and ex-wife all in the past, he isn't really doing so as he still seems to want to see her and know all about what she is like now.
The reader particularly feels the poet's affection and longing for Alice as he starts the poem with 'Alice', directly addressing his former wife to show that he was truly thinking about her a lot when he was writing the poem. Also, the poet uses the first person to write the poem and directly addresses the reader by using personal pronouns ('you'), and 'you' is repeated for many times in the poem, showing that again the poet is obsessed with 'Alice' and that he can't stop thinking about her, emphasising how much he longs for her.
A lot of winter imagery is used in the poem ('The earth's still as hard', 'empty gardens'). This is used so that the reader can visualise these scenes and connect them to the status of the poet's relationship with 'Alice': There's no warmth, no passion, their relationship is dead and non existent just like how the gardens are 'empty' and how all the plants and flowers die in winter. This emphasises the feeling of loss and emptiness. There are a few opposites in the poem, for example 'winter' and 'warmth' (which is used when describing 'Alice') as well as 'inviting' and 'isolation' (again 'inviting' was used when describing 'Alice'). The words 'warmth' and 'inviting' are deeply tempting and the reader is attracted to these words, as compared to the words 'isolation' and 'winter. This lets the reader experience how much the poet longs to be with 'Alice' again and his attraction towards her.
